ArcaMax

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friends and I were planning a surprise baby shower for our other friend. I have been the main person planning everything and have been working hard to keep this a surprise. However, I just found out that one of the girls accidentally spilled the beans about it two weeks ago, and no one told me. I am beyond irritated because no...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I've been married for 14 years now. My husband and I have three kids together, and we live in a beautiful home. My friends and family often compliment us on how great we look and how proud they are of us; however, I think he's cheating. When you are with someone for so long, there are certain behaviors and habits that you notice ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I cut things off with my boyfriend recently. Unfortunately, I do not think it was the right time for us to be together. Throughout our relationship, we had many problems that all stemmed from us not being mature enough to be in a serious relationship.

Breaking up has been hard. We decided to go no-contact so we don't fall back ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: Sometimes my husband will bend the truth just to prove heÕs right, and honestly, it drives me a little crazy. HeÕs always been stubborn, but at this point in our lives, I donÕt understand why ÒwinningÓ small, meaningless arguments still matters so much to him. ItÕs not even about big issues -- it's little things. For ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I caught my 16-year-old daughter smoking cigarettes out of her window today, and IÕm beside myself. I asked her how long sheÕs been doing this and who got her into smoking, and she told me this was her first cigarette and nobody told her to smoke. When I looked at her cigarette pack, it was half empty -- she was lying to me! I ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I confided in someone I thought was a close friend about some pain points and concerns I experience with my brother. This was hard for me to do because I prefer not to discuss family matters with other people, but I guess I was feeling overwhelmed and really needed to vent in the moment. I thought I was in a safe space when I ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My 14-year-old daughter recently came home from school sobbing because she said that a lot of the boys were calling her ugly. As her mother, I feel horrible and partially responsible since she takes after me. She looks so much like me when I was her age, and I hate to admit it, but itÕs not a great thing. Seeing her so upset ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I feel horrible. I confronted my husband because I thought he was cheating on me, but as it turns out, he was surprising me with a trip to Paris for our 10-year wedding anniversary. For the past six months, my husband has been acting secretive. I was seeing random charges in our account that he wouldnÕt tell me about, and he was...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My sister lost her job six months ago and hasn't been able to find a new one. She worked in tech for 10 years at some great companies, but she hasn't found any success. She recently asked if she could move into the spare bedroom in my family's house because she has blown through all of her savings. I told her that I'll have to ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I've been married to my husband for about 10 years now, and we have two kids together. My husband is a great provider. He is comforting and stable. To maintain our household, he works most of the week, and when he is home, he's tired. I understand the difficulties of paying bills and keeping yourself afloat, so I do not take ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have had the same best friend for nearly a decade -- since middle school. Due to the length of our friendship, I have gotten close with her and her family, even going on trips with them. I've noticed lately that I have started to develop feelings for her brother. He's a year younger than us and consistently accompanies us on ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: It feels like my parents neglect to recognize my birthday every year, and it is becoming painful. My birthday was about two months ago, and they didn't make time to celebrate with me. I shared with them that I'd love to go out to dinner or do something together. After the day passed with no celebration, I told them that this ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I started a book club around eight months ago, and I advertised it on my community's Facebook page. I was so excited because the first time I hosted, it was a success. More than 30 people came, and the discussion we had on the book was amazing. As I've hosted more sessions, the numbers have slowly started to dwindle, with as few ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My son, a young Black man, has just experienced his first-ever run-in with law enforcement. He has a 1 a.m. curfew and was on his way home from hanging out with friends. In an attempt to make it home on time, he drove above the speed limit; he was pulled over and had a panic attack. The officers who stopped him asked him to step ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My mom has always had a troubled relationship with my grandmother, primarily due to growing up in poverty, surrounded by so much uncertainty. Due to her upbringing, my mom vowed to provide her children with a better life than what she had. After high school, my mom left home and became the first one in her family to obtain a ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: A few months ago, I traveled home for winter break and went on a date with a former classmate. I was surprised when he asked me out, mainly because growing up, I was the only gay boy in my grade. To be honest, I really wasn't even that interested in him; I just wanted to see what this was about. Turns out, we get along well. He ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been going out with this guy for a few months now. He's great. His energy makes me feel comfortable, we have great conversations and he is well-mannered. When we have disagreements, they stay respectful and productive; however, there is one caveat: He has two kids, a son and daughter. They are both in middle school, and ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently started working as a manager of a bank in New York City, and I'm having a hard time fitting in socially because most of my co-workers come from extremely wealthy families. They often talk about their extravagant weekend plans that include skiing or taking weekend trips. I don't come from this type of money, so it's ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband wants to go on a fishing trip for a month up in Canada. I told him no, but he keeps pressing the matter. He works hard and hasn't taken a day off in more than two years, so part of me wants to say yes to him. However, we have two teenage daughters who are heavily involved in sports at high school, and I don't think I ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I went on a first date last weekend with the founder of a startup. We went out for dinner and got drinks afterward. I had a great time. He says he wants to keep seeing me; however, he travels a lot for work, so I won't be able to see him again until late next month. I don't know if I want to be with someone who is never around. I...Read more